I just got back from Atlanta. I should know on Monday about the job. If it works out, I’ll be there in two weeks to start work. Friday is my last day at my hotel here in Orlando… and I’ll have a week off in between.
And my Mom. Things are not good. The doctor is talking about the ‘end’ – and it’s much too soon. Months. Not nearly enough time for me. She’s too young. I’m too young. My kids are too young.
She’s much too good for this.
I don’t know what I’ll do & how I can manage without her. I need her too much.
And I can’t stop crying.
Somehow I have to get up in the morning and go to work. At least for five more days. I still have to be a Mom.. a daughter- a sister… still think about moving away…when I can’t even imagine waking up in the morning and dealing with the pain that I’m feeling right now.
And I don’t know what to say. And no one knows what to say to me. And that’s okay because I know it’s not easy to talk about… and when I do talk about it I just end up crying some more… and puffy eyes are not easy to cover up with make-up.