A few years ago I realized just how competitive of a person I am. I probably should’ve realized this sooner… I mean, there were a few clues:
- Playing a midway game with my then four year old son and physically not being able to let him win. The guy running the game covered my stream of water with something to try and get me to stop. I shot him with a seriously dirty look. Hey… I gave the kid my spiderman prize…sheesh.
- Sometimes getting a little over zealous watching game shows and shouting out the answer faster than anyone I happen to be in the room with. (even when there’s no one in the room with me, I’ll shout out the answer… you never know when someone might just walk in, you know?)
- While playing cards with friends, I started to accuse my husband of cheating because he actually started winning. Well… he doesn’t win ‘Pounce’ very often and I was suspicious!
- Playing that same card game became VERY competitive with Marti and her husband. We would shuffle each others’ decks and count out the cards to make sure none of us were cheating. (that’s what happens when you play with OTHER competitive people)
I wasn’t in any sort of team sports as a kid. I was in marching band… not a lot of competition there. (except when ‘chair’ tryouts came around. Man, flute players can be vicious!) Although, I do remember proclaiming in public that I would be the “Future Drum Major” when I was just a freshman. That was pretty ballsy… considering I was only a freshman AND I was a girl. Most DMs were boys back then.
I’ve noticed that a little competition can really motivate me. Even though I’m afraid of losing, I always want to join in and *try* to win. And it’s not always so much that I need to *win* – I just don’t want to be left out of all the fun. I want to keep playing! I want to be INCLUDED. I like to feel like I’m a part of something. I think that’s what really inspires me to keep competing. I hated being the kid that was picked last… or didn’t get the ‘inside joke’ or wasn’t part of the “cool” kids. Well, I was never going to be a cool kid because I. was. in. the. band. I didn’t care, because I was a part of the band. We were a “we” and I liked that. (and let me tell ya – we SUCKED – there were NO competitions that we were going to win… that’s for sure)
I always thought that I was goal-oriented type person… but maybe that’s just competitiveness with a much more politically correct title.