I hate them.

Moonshoes.

Who thought this was a good idea? Let’s strap some rubber bands on my kids’ feet and some plastic that adds about five inches all the way around and make them about six inches taller. Then let’s send him out to bounce around and jump near all kinds of things that could certainly put us in a situation where I’m having to explain ‘moonshoes’ to an emergency room doctor.

This kid… the boy… he’s already hampered with a severe lack of coordination simply because he’s related to me… not to mention his limbs are growing at a faster rate of speed than he can keep up with (picture the scarecrow’s dance from The Wizard of Oz) most of the time… then you’re going to give him these ankle-twisting-bone-fracturing-danger shoes?? Why? Why would anyone do that?

Oh yeah… that’s right. They were a gift from this weekend’s trip to my MIL’s house.

The kids tried them out while at my sister’s place. They were only allowed to use them on the grass. While on the grass I noticed the trees, that were newly planted, were being secured by wire and wooden stakes. So then the moonshoed kids were only allowed to bounce in a 5×5 foot area that was away from the skull-cracking cement and the organ-impaling stakes.

Doesn’t that sound like fun?

Picture me cringing and wincing each time one of them lost their balance or the wind blew a little harder which made them start to tip over.

Yes, I was the crazy Mom screeching “Stay away from that tree! Get off the sidewalk! Move away from the stake! No, not steak… STAKE! Move away from it! No! Farther away from the sidewalk! Ohhhhhh.. just TAKE. THEM. OFF.”

Good times. Good times.

When we arrived home Sunday night, the moonshoes did not make it in the house. Like I need to be worried about the kids putting them on and bouncing around near the stairs??

Like I need MY MOM to be worried about the kids putting them on and bouncing around near the stairs? (’cause that’s way worse…believe me)

No. The trunk is where they will stay. (until I run them over with the car)

(accidentally)