Smack in the Middle

This is how you can tell that you live with children:

and this:

No, there hasn’t been a party. The short ones just decided they wanted to blow up balloons. Now I feel like I just won the grand prize on a game show whenever I try to get to the dining room.

The children also demanded explosives to celebrate the holiday. Since they obviously run the house, we obliged.

‘Cause nothing says “Independence” like almost setting your lawn on fire.

Good thing we had that small metal bowl filled with water - for emergencies.

This one was dressed like a boy all day. At least that what it looked like to me. She also acted like one for a good part of it. I finally put a halt to the bodily function humor coming from her little lips. I couldn’t take it anymore.

I’m hoping that today I’ll have my sweet little girl back. Otherwise that flowery and girly scrapbook page I finished yesterday is going to seem very silly.

I’m celebrating my independence from WORK for three whole days! Can I get an HALLELUJAH for paid holidays?!

I hope you’re enjoying your day - no matter what you’re doing!

(I’m scrapbooking, dontcha know!)

I had to bed and plead and beg this little girl to stand in front of the upcoming High School Musical advertisement at the movie theater a couple of weekends ago. Beg her. “Please… please… for me! I’ll be your best friend!” was heard coming out of my mouth… to a seven-year-old. She finally acquiesced (see Jules, I can use big words too) and I got these two shots. (on my phone - sigh - bad scrapbooker, bad, bad scrapbooker)

Could you have resisted? Look how cute she is! And she’s even wearing an HSM shirt!

(Imagine how much better these photos would be if they weren’t taken on a PHONE. Dammit.)

She was totally embarassed. She does not like attention on her unless she decides it’s okay. (and that’s usually only around family or close friends - and even that can be pushing it)

You know this is only the beginning. Imagine what she’s going to be like as a teenager. Personally, I believe that its a parents job to embarass their children. It’s a perk - and it’s one that we should all take full advantage of.

I’ve already started getting my ammunition together. That’s another benefit to being a scrapbooker - it’s all saved and archived in technicolor and glue and a few embellishments… all ready and waiting to be pulled out at a moment’s notice like, um, oh, I don’t know… 

a first date… graduation party… engagement party… whenever.

At this time I’d like to officially thank my parents for showing the video of an eight-year-old Jen hula-dancing in a grass skirt and bikini top at my engagement party.

It was great. Just freakin’ great.

And now my kids will be able to thank them too.

Two of the best ways to spend a Sunday!

I would be the not-so-smart one who forgot her camera. (this photo and the one from the previous post were taken with my phone) And I mean, I forgot it… as in it’s all the way back home in Atlanta. I didn’t bring it with me at all. WTF was I thinking? Oh yeah, that’s right. I was thinking of work and training and not making a complete fool of myself in front of an entire hotel management team… when really I should have been thinking of documenting my day with two of my favorite people in the whole wide world! Stupid, stupid.

Luckily Julie and Jen brought their cameras - and I’m hoping they’ll share their pics with me! (except of all the ones with just ME in them!)

We had brunch (and Mimosas - have I mentioned the mimosas?) at Too-Jay’s and shopped at Ruban Rouge (one of the very best scrapbook stores I’ve ever been to - ever). Then we got a little lost on the way back. Don’t worry - we drove towards the airplanes and made it safe and sound back to the hotel.

It was a great afternoon & it went by much too fast!

I feel like I’ve been saying good-bye a lot lately… and it’s never easy, especially to these two girls!

xoxo

Photo at the airport - waiting to board the plane. Doesn’t this look like fun?

I made it to Florida - when I got here, the hotel lost power. I tried updating before my battery died - but that didn’t go so well. The power finally came back on and I was able to enjoy dinner with the HR Director - and use the elevator to my room when they finally started working again. (walking up 12 flights of stairs did not sound like FUN)

The classes seemed to go well. I got good feedback from the managers who attended. They said that they couldn’t believe it was the first time I had facilitated the class. (whew - I guess I fooled them)

Luckily - it all went better than the day I left:

That morning, I heard my alarm go off at 6:00am and I stumble out of bed. I walk into the bathroom and get in the shower. I opened the window in the shower and noticed how dark it was outside. And it stayed dark. Hmmm… that’s weird. Shouldn’t the sun be coming up by now?

I get out of the shower and start getting into that “getting-ready-for-work” mode in addition to the “don’t-forget-to-pack-your-hair-products” mode when I decide to open the door and look at the alarm clock.

It read 1:30am, not 6:30am.

I had woken up 5 hours early wihtout making sure that it was the correct time. And I showered. And I started getting ready.

Shit.

Okay then… I guess that explains why I was so tired. Back to bed for a five-hour nap.

Anyway - I’ve been able to get more sleep since I arrived - especially now that the classes are over. And tomorrow I get to see my girls! I can’t wait!!

Busy weekend and week… I leave tomorrow for Florida to teach a leadership class at one of my company’s hotels. Wish me luck. I’m not 100% confident in the material. Plus my Magic 8 Ball said that it probably wouldn’t go well. I wonder what the night dishwasher would say.

However - I will get to spend some time with my girls… and that is  the best part of all!

I’ll try to update from the road. Since I’ll be studying like a mad-woman up until the very last moment that I have to start teaching, it is unlikely that I’ll have the time…. unless, of course, I start to procrastinate and pay more attention to blogging and being online instead of studying the material. (that sounds more like me)

‘Cause there’s nothing like winging it when you’re teaching material to people who could impact your future with the company!

Okay… think positive-confident-anti-career-suicide thoughts.

I wonder if I can get a Magic 8 Ball into an airport approved ziploc bag. (it has liquid in it, you know)

What movie? Anyone?

(Marti knows it!)

My day yesterday was crazy. Seriously.

I’m dealing with mega-issues at work that are taking a lot of time and space in my brain. I have an intern who is apparently a distant relative of John Edward (on the never-before-heard of Asian side of his family) and is now communicating with my assistant’s dead husband. You can imagine the wide-range of emotions this brought up in our office. Later I was insulted by a colleage at a Staff Meeting in front of about 20 other managers. And then my sister forgot to tell me that she was going to be arriving at my house that evening with her family to stay for the weekend.

Did I also mention that I thought it would be a really good time to go cold turkey on medicine that I’ve been taking for the past four years. NOT pretty.

It was also a full moon.

I had a dishwasher in my office with a complaint about his supervisor towards the end of the day. I was exasperated at this point (due to all issues listed above) and looked at the guy and said, “What is wrong with this place? Why are these people behaving this way?”

He said, “I just don’t know Jen.”

Because I’m now taking advice from one of my dishwashers.

He’s quite the philosopher.

My assistant was begging me to go back on the medicine. She even offered to call my doctor for me. Isn’t she the sweetest? I told her that I was perfectly fine to handle the day’s issues… and that it didn’t matter one bit that my lips were numb, my teeth hurt and my eyeballs felt like they were drying out inside my head. It didn’t matter. I was fine.

This is clearly the talk of a crazy-person. Only crazy people think they are fine when their lips are numb. It’s a fact.

I got on with the day… shrinking eyeballs and all. I saw my favorite colleague later on and asked if he wouldn’t mind removing the dagger from my back. He was all like, what? what are you talking about? Yeah. I also declined his offer to carpool with him to work every day. (The increased price in gas is worth my sanity [which is also questionable at this point], thankyouverymuch) Then I consumed two glasses of really good wine.

After that I went home and watched So You Think You Can Dance. (the best show on TV right now)

This morning I called my doctor & had my prescription refilled.

My little reader. This girl loves to read. And I love that she loves to read. She has plowed through almost every ‘kids’ book we own (and we have quite a collection) and is constantly asking for more.

Last week she decided that she would start the Little House  collection. I saved the whole collection I got as a gift when I was ten or eleven years old. That’s when I read them. I became obsessed interested in Laura Ingalls Wilder after that & read as much about her as I could from what was in my middle school library. And of course I watched the TV Show  pretty religiously… I even remember western/pioneer fashion being very popular.

(I’d insert my 7th grade photo with me wearing the purple and blue plaid ruffled shirt - but the laughter would be too deafening)

She’s seven - and she’s already into second book of the collection. Already.

I don’t think she’ll be quite as interested in Laura Ingalls as she is in Hannah Montana or The Jonas Brothers… but we’ll see.

Last week at work seriously kicked my ass. Big time. You know that kind of HR week where the unemployment officer on the appeal hearing conference call practically offers to drive the ex-employee to the EEOC. (and the ex-employee has no reason to go to there at all)

What? You’ve never had one of those weeks?

Every time I think I have a handle on things at the hotel, all of a sudden I have a couple of management resignations and a sexual harassment investigation in my lap. (and no, my lap is not the reason for the latter)

One day this week shortly after my eleventh hour of meetings all due to associate relations issues, I had to tell a supervisor to please have that “tough” conversation with the associate somewhere else because I had to go home.

Hey, I said ‘please’.

My assistant said, “Wow, you sounded like a Director when you said that.” (damn - it only took me five years)

So maybe it was all the super-fantastic-fun of the work week that made me the weepy daughter-in-law this weekend. Who knows?

All I know is that after I looked through the photo album for my husband’s fortieth birthday and came across photos of my Mom I could not. stop. crying.

Now it’s Sunday night and I’m about to start another week at work. I’m trying to be positive and think that maybe this week will be better. Sounds good, right?  

Yeah.  After a couple of phone calls from the hotel this weekend, I’m not feeling super-confident.

I’m going to try for a good night’s sleep (ha!) and maybe a renewed sense of positivity for the upcoming week.

Happy Monday y’all!

A new family has moved into our neighborhood.

They seem nice - they’re quiet and polite.  We only hear them early in the mornings and around dusk - that’s when they get sort of chatty.